What is a Modern Molly Mormon?

Since revamping Modern Molly Mormon, I've been asked by a few readers what happened to the archives? Well, I wanted to start everything new. From scratch. Modern Molly Mormon had close to 1000 posts and during the accumulation of those posts we underwent several complete redesigns and the code in the posts didn't always match up so some of the pages were missing images, overflowed into the sidebars or had broken links and just plain looked terrible.

In revamping Modern Molly Mormon I was certain of one thing: I would keep the archives in drafts so that weekly I could re-post old articles, guest posts and contributions. This would give me a chance to fix code errors while at the same time bringing old articles to new readers and a refresher to long time Mollys.

So if you miss the old articles from the past, keep your eyes open and don't worry, they'll be coming back one post at a time.

From the Archive: Originally posted December 26th, 2007

The original idea of Modern Molly Mormon came when a friend and I were talking over instant messenger. We talked about how hard it is to be a Mormon woman in today's society, and how we did want to be the "Molly Mormon," but that's a stereotype that is either looked down upon or too high to reach.

"Molly Mormon" is a term for a stereotype given to certain female members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, thought to be pure, innocent and completely wrapping her life in and around the Church. She makes everything from scratch, has 150% Visiting Teaching, works in soup kitchens, bakes homemade bread everyday, and makes her own clothes. She married in the temple to a Returned Missionary and may have even served one herself. She knows the scriptures ALL by heart, speaks in public with eloquence and great inspiration, goes to the temple three times a week, and has never missed Church. She knows 70 different ways to cook Jello, has a bag of cheerios in her pocket during Sacrament, and 8 different highlighters for her Scriptures during Sunday School. She's served in Primary, Nursery, Young Women's and Relief Society, and can't wait to have a calling in the Scouts. She has never been in debt, has at least nine children, and has completed not only her Family History, but all her scrapbooks and even a few quilts.

I'd like to meet that woman! I have in fact met a few close to it, but there's always something missing. We're not perfect, it's why we're here in the first place. To learn.

Let's face it, striving to be the "perfect" Mormon woman is hard! Some of us weren't raised in the Church, and others were but maybe fell away a time or two. Some are converts who may be struggling with the changes in their lives, and others could be life time members who maybe didn't exactly marry "Peter Priesthood."

"While women live in homes under many different circumstances—married, single, widowed, or divorced, some with children and some without—all are beloved of God, and He has a plan for His righteous daughters to receive the highest blessings of eternity." (Elder M. Russell Ballard, April 2008 General Conference)

Modern Mollya are girls who don't exactly fit the mold of a typical "Molly Mormon". We may be behind on our food storage, not know how to bake bread from scratch, or clean an oven. We may have trouble with finances, or get nervous when speaking in church. But we love our Heavenly Father, and the Church, and we're good at plenty of other things! We are each given different talents so that we can share them with others. While some may not be great at playing a musical instrument, they might have a great talent for singing! While some might not have their food storage up to par, they do read their scriptures every single day! We must share our abilities with one another, help one another rise up and learn.

"You are doing the best you can, and that best results in good to yourself and to others. Do not nag yourself with a sense of failure. Get on your knees and ask for the blessings of the Lord; then stand on your feet and do what you are asked to do. Then leave the matter in the hands of the Lord. You will discover that you have accomplished something beyond price." (Gordon B. Hinckley, "To The Women of the Church" 2003)

Modern Molly Mormon is not about being perfect, it's about striving to do good. The following is an excerpt from a devotional by Elder Cecil O. Samuelson of the Seventy, in 2002 titled, "What Does it Mean to Be Perfect?"

Doing Your Best	Perfectionism
You desire to give things your best efforts and are satisfied when you do.	You have a list of “shoulds” and “have to’s” and are dissatisfied even if you complete them.
You know it’s okay if you make a mistake. You move on and see your mistake as an opportunity for growth or learning.	Mistakes bring feelings of self-hatred. You don’t want to do anything because you are afraid of failure.
You want to do your personal best, and you try not to compare your achievements to those of others. You don’t need to be the best at all things.	You feel tremendous pressure to earn others’ approval. You must be the best or “perfect” in your tasks.
You can find joy in doing the things you love, and you can get things accomplished.	Your need to do things perfectly leads to procrastination until you have time to do it “perfectly,” and you feel driven by fear or duty instead of love.
Trying to do your best and perfecting yourself “line upon line” with the Savior’s help is Christ-centered because you need the Atonement.	Perfectionism is self-centered. You measure yourself against your own standards and against others’ standards, not God’s.

Without assuming that all Mollys are the exact same, may I suggest that we Modern Mollys fit into the category on the left, and the stereotype we have been trying to live up to for so long, is that on the right.

Modern Molly Mormon is for we LDS women who are striving to do good, to better ourselves daily, to love and care for our families, and to serve God with a loving heart.

Image: FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Touch of Faith

Whenever I am sick, I think of this story in the scriptures. The woman with the issue of blood. She was sick for twelve years, cast out by her fellow man as tainted and unclean because of her illness. I cannot imagine the pain she must have felt. The loneliness.

Whenever I am sick, I never think of when Jesus healed the blind, or raised the dead. Maybe because in those instances He went to them. He saw the sickness, and came to them. I identify with the woman who sought out the Savior. Perhaps it's because I know it's up to me to seek Him out. He is there, ready to heal me, but I have to show faith in Him. I have to reach for Him.

Certainly if He wanted to, Jesus could heal me of my current sickness. He could do so personally, or use the priesthood to make my fever and cough subside. But even those healing are based upon faith. I wonder if I could have had the kind of faith it took for that woman to be healed.

I don't think about the physical ailments that currently plague me. Instead the spiritual ailments that have been holding me back, all of my own doing of course. Choosing sleep instead of Church, TV instead of scriptures, and pride instead of the kind of humility it takes to reach out, and be healed. A physical Jesus is not here for me to reach out to, to touch the hem of his garment, but I can still reach for Him.

Instead of touching the hem of his garment, knowing I can be healed by it, I can reach out and touch the pages of his ministry, and find within them the keys to healing of the soul.

And, behold, a woman, which was diseased with an issue of blood twelve years, came behind him, and touched the hem of his garment:
For she said within herself, If I may but touch his garment, I shall be whole.
But Jesus turned him about, and when he saw her, he said, Daughter, be of good comfort; thy faith hath made thee whole. And the woman was made whole from that hour.
(Matt 9:20-22, emphasis added)

Of course right now, chicken soup couldn't hurt.

The Return of Modern Molly Mormon

When I first started Modern Molly Mormon I was inactive and trying to come back to full activity in the Church. My inactivity wasn't due to one reason or another, and I hadn't transgressed dramatically. I wasn't on bad terms with the Church and I still believed. I believed everything. But somehow, little by little I just stopped going. On lazy Sunday turned into two. Soon I was accepting jobs that required me to work. I stopped reading my scriptures everyday, and eventually, I stopped praying all together. Little by little.

Modern Molly Mormon was supposed to help bring me back. And it did. Little by little. But little by little it stopped being a blog about spirituality. It stopped being a way to spread the gospel. It stopped being a way to bear my testimony. It started being a business. I started paying attention to stats, followers, and daily hits. Modern Molly Mormon was fast becoming popular and at one point we had over 30 different contributors. Posts went up daily. We were even planning having a convention. I was comparing Modern Molly Mormon to many other popular LDS sites. Mormon Mommy Blogs was growing rapidly as well, and instead of being happy for their success (because I love the women there) I found myself bitter that their increase of success was overshadowing my own.

Modern Molly Mormon stopped being about the gospel, and I realised that I had stopped living it.

For behold, thus saith the Lord God: I will give unto the children of men line upon line, precept upon precept, here a little and there a little; and blessed are those who hearken unto my precepts, and lend an ear unto my counsel, for they shall learn wisdom; for unto him that receiveth I will give more; and from them that shall say, We have enough, from them shall be taken away even that which they have. 
(2 Nephi 28:30, emphasis added)

The website helped ground me in my faith. But I had forgotten the message. Consumed by numbers and stats, I'd forgotten the whole reason I wanted to make the site in the first place. To help build faith. To break the stereotype of Mormon women. To show that we aren't perfect. Because perfection isn't a state of being, it's a pathway. And as I had forgotten, that which I already had, was taken away.

I've thought about ways to revamp the site. I've done countless redesigns, stats and numbers never far from my mind. I cut down on contributors and cut back on the number of posts. And then I put the site into maintenance mode . . . for six months. Until I realised that I'd lost the original purpose of Modern Molly Mormon all together.

So here it is now. Me. The original Modern Molly Mormon. One writer. One simple little blog. Hoping to reignite that deep faith I once had. Hoping to spread the gospel little by little. Hoping to bear my testimony to one reader or one thousand. Numbers shouldn't matter anymore, only the message matters.


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